Reminders

A few people have touched in their blogs in different ways how they find it difficult to accept that they are no longer fat. I know the feeling! I was overweight for probably close to 25-30 years, more than half my life!!! Over this time I started to avoid looking at myself in shop windows, mirrors and hated photos being taken of me as I didn’t want to face up to what I saw. I’m around 28 kilos lighter than my heaviest weight.

When I started WW this time so start with I could almost feel the weight fall off me and I could really notice the changes in my body (what a great feeling). Now as my weight is stable it’s so hard to remember what I used to feel like. I sometimes find it really hard to accept it’s gone and that I am slimmer. (Hope this makes sense because I know what I’m trying to say but not sure quite how to say it!!)

When I look in a mirror now I tend to concentrate on the parts of me that still bug me, e.g. the bulging middle or in the photo I posted the other day all I could see was the bumpy back view, but I don’t think anyone notices – only me! And that’s it – negative thoughts really as all I’m concentrating on what I think needs to go – not on what I have done! I will have to keep reminding myself!!

I have the same sometimes negative thoughts about the exercise I do, I read other blogs and think how fantastic you all are, doing so many different ways of exercise, boxing, biking, running, walking, gym etc and I tend to forget what I’m doing!! For instance so far this week I’ve done two sessions at the gym and four aqua sessions, so need to remember I’m doing O.K. in that area too! There’s always room for improvement but I’m not doing too bad.

So – my reminders to me are
- I’ve lost and kept off 28 kilos
- I average 7 or more sessions of exercise a week – sometimes more
- I have learnt to read food labels and (mostly) make healthy food choices
- My diet is (mostly) balanced and healthy
- I’ve quartered the blood pressure medication I’m on
- I can buy ‘normal’ clothes
- To stand back occasionally and look in the mirror and ignore the not so good parts!!

- last but not least - these last few kilos may take forever to get off but I have to look at how far I've come!!! (and the last few kilos will go, not sure when but they will!)

When I think about the exercise that I’m doing - this has probably been far more of a change to my lifestyle than losing weight. I have lost weight in the past only to gain it back but this time around I have exercised and shocked not only myself but those close to me. And instead of knocking myself like I can do, I’m starting to realise that I should probably give myself a bit of credit. The 98 plus kilo couch potato that I was is now sitting around 70 – 71 kilos and heaps healthier and the couch potato has gone! Well almost…

Does anyone else ever get that feeling when you go to the gym and pull up in the car park! My feeling usually is – oh no – here I go again!!! Must admit it does disappear pretty quickly and forgotten once I start the program – it’s just some days I pull up and think I don’t want to do this today!! But I do – then enjoy it.

Thanks for you comments on the photos, we do love it over at the coast. We were lucky as we bought the section years ago and now they are quite pricey. We used to have a camper van when the family were growing up and over the years have seen quite a bit of the country side, but the beach we have bought at is so close to home that we usually made a few visits every year. We always thought that one day we would love a place there. Not too many properties there go on the market and when they do they are sky high - then they opened up some sections and we found we could build cheaper than buying a little bach – seems ridiculous but that’s how it is. So we leapt in and got a section and have finally got our place built. It’s a bit of dream come true and a lot of hard work (a bit like losing weight!)

Oh yep – the scales, they are minus the battery again. I know I have to try and stop concentrating on them.