A loss!

Well, well! I wasn't quite expecting that but I will take it! Yes!! A loss of

900 grams!!.

I can't remember the last time I recorded a loss like that, in fact it would be going back a couple of years. Just what I needed. My positive thoughts are paying of! I know it was my first weigh in so I won't be expecting further losses like that, but I don't care how small they are as long as I head downwards. I got through the week eating much like I normally would, but one thing I did was track (everything!) so no 'forgotten' bit and pieces. I can and I am going to do this. Now have 4.6 to lose to get back down to my lowest weight, so that is my first goal. This coming week plans are to track, (I'm finding my spreadsheet a great tool for this - a bit nerdy but it works) get back into exercise, I've missed it and that surprised me losing with very little exercise.

We found out this week Jordyn our grandson does have a hearing problem and needs grommets (spelling??) at least it is something they can sort. The doctor asked if he had been in hospital before - Rachel had to list the asthma visits, the operations on his birthmark, also the croup. Poor kid seems to have a few hospital visits stacked into four and half years. Also this morning Devin eye's showed they have deteriorated since the first test - so he has to wear his glasses all the time. LOL this was the second eye test appointment as the first one was cancelled because he lost his glasses. This morning, no glasses in his school bag, (according to his Dad) Debbie went down to school - they searched high and low, even the head teacher helping, Devin said he remembered putting them in his desk but not there. Last resort Debbie emptied out the school bag and there they were. She said to Devin that he had told her he remembered putting them in his desk - he replied - that's what my brain was saying!

And....
I got an email this morning that touched home a bit with me. A very close friend (not local)revealed her husband (also Peter's close friend) has been told he is experiencing panic attacks. I sat here for a while and thought what should I do here? Should I open up? Something I have touched on here briefly before and I found it really hard to admit. I thought maybe I can help if I do say - so I did. I emailed back and told her of my experiences, her reply was: Holy cow... What you have said is exactly what the Mental health councillor told us..... ***** is on Rescue remedy and finds it ok...Do you mind if I call you tonight?? It was hard to tell her what I did, but now I'm glad I have. Part of my email to her: It's something I kept really quiet but have had them for quite a few years, starting after Mum died and when I was going through all the crap at ***** (work ). From memory I think one in four people can experience them at some time in their life. Mine seemed to be in a crowd situation, or walking through town, standing in queues. I felt like I wanted to run and get away. The very first one I thought I had a "funny" turn, I was in town, popped into see *****, went dizzy and felt like I couldn't walk, she said I was white as a sheet. I got back to the car, drove home and was still shaky. Had a couple more (not as severe)and then went to the docs and told them - they diagnosed panic attacks. Gave me anti-depressants?? I didn't feel depressed though so didn't take them, I ended up going to hypnotherapy -which helped.

Why "own up here" well because I also do blame being overweight partly on what happened to me those years ago. A really huge viscious circle - I had such low self esteem because of my weight, I'm sure that and the other stress I had going on in my life at the time triggered these of. They started when I was at my highest weight so I do wonder. I felt the attacks as a huge weakness on my part and it is hard to actually come out and own up. Can say they are few and far between now days and nothing to the extent they were. I hope I can help my friend.